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knit me more time...
Monday, April 25, 2005
kid fears

Today on the bus ride home, I thought about this summer's upcoming prelim. I was actually trying to figure out what I was more afraid of-- failing the prelim, or the three months spent studying for the prelim, or the stress that I will need to keep in check while study, or it will wreck havic with my soul and body. And then the Indigo Girls' song Kid Fears came on. This song always reminds me of my first year of college at Hofstra University. I had a little group of first year theatre major friends, Sherri, Taryn, Stacey and Tom*. We were all fresh out of small towns, and very enthusiastic about being out on our own. Looking back on it, I realize how very serious and intense we were about exploring the world (which at that point was Hempstead and NYC) and figuring who were were out as individuals. We were all doing so much for the first time- coming out, drinking, staying out all night, taking the train in at 5am and you don't want to know what else... We were all very devoted to each other. We would spend hours and hours and hours talking in the middle of the night and really validated each other as people. When I had my first big Master Electrician job, on opening night the group made me cards and paper flowers (I still have them). I had never felt so supported by a group of friends before. Well, we would sit around and sing Kid Fears, realizing how separate we were all of a sudden from our kid fears. Taryn would play the guitar and Stacey and I would do the Michael Stipe parts in the background. Afterward we would make Taryn sing White Rabbit and Me & Bobby McGee (she sounded just like Janis, I swear). Now I wish I had my kid fears (or even my first year of college fears) to worry about instead of big things like a prelim exam. *I miss these people a lot sometimes. (More than I miss 99% of my HS classmates, although we went to school for 12+ years with each other.) We all scattered and went our separate ways after our first year (after we figured out we hated Hofstra). I haven't seen any of them in 10 years. I was in touch with Sherri, but we lost touch a while back. Taryn married our friend Tim, and they have kids and I get little cute picture cards from them sometimes at christmas. Stacey and Tom are god knows were- I google them sometimes and can never find them. I just like to imagine that we'll all meet up some day.

posted by knit wit | 4/25/2005 03:39:00 PM

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